I got this tonight from a friend~ the check says pay to the order of me and says one home perfect for her family with a white picket fence and yard. How totally cool is that? My griend knows that I want to get out of this apartment~ although it is ok it is a little small, especially with my older children returning home after having moved off.

I have always dreamed of a house with a white picket fence.... Here would be one that would be a dream come true!

My friend has been trying to get me to dream BIG~ to stop my limiting thinking and let my imagination take me to my future. It has been something that I have struggled with. I catch myself "settling". I limit how far I can go with something by a lot of unintentional negative self talk.

I am TONS better about this than I was just a few years ago. Mostly becuase of my journey with positive/happy thinking. Where 3 years ago when I started the positive thinking journey, I had maybe 20% of my day that was focused positive thinking today I am seeing that more than 75% of my day is focused positive thinking.

BUT~

As my friend pointed out~ I will only let myself go so far with positive thinking and limit myself even more when it comes to bringing new things into my life. I know that this is in part because I really do not like change. I am uncomfortable with the unknown and will stay stuck where I am to avoid having to reach out into a unknown world.

Like with moving... I convinced myself to wait on the move. Even though I was excited about the prospect of moving to Savanah, even though it was such a wonderful opportunity and would have been fantastic, I convinced myself that I needed to stay here for a while. I had a million excuses why moving right now wasn't a good idea. Now, because my children need stability above and beyond anything else, I will be staying here at least until next June.

Part of me is relieved at that. Because I do not like change and this year has been so full of changes. Yet there is a part of me whistful that I didn't take the leap and go.

So my friend, giving me encouragement said to me~ rather than focusing on the WHERE of where I wanted to move and live, focus on the house I want. She said get it all out on paper. Make a detailed list of all the must haves and make them as real to me as I possibly can. She said use pictures and paint verbal pictures and really see how my family and I will live in the house. She told me not limit my thinking with "I can't afford that" "How will I keep it up" "There isn't anything like that around here"... no excuses. If I want a stainglass window in the bathroom put it there in my dream house even if someone else might think it silly.

So I promised her that over the next few days I am going to create my house in my mind~ and then get it wrote out and seek out some pictures to go with it and make a webpage just for my dream house. So hang in with me and sometime in the next few days I should be posting a link for the website and share with you my dream house (which by the way really will have a stainglass window in the bathroom)